I’ve had the same bedtime routine with our oldest since she was old enough to talk. Tub, brush teeth, read a book, sing a song and “talk about my day”. Sure we switch up what books we read, she’s really into our back to school book list right now, and what songs we sing but one thing that doesn’t change are the 3 questions that I ask her before she goes to sleep. It’s how we talk about our day.
It started when I was working full time, as a way for her and I to connect after being apart all day. It was a chance for us to share parts of our day that we didn’t usually talk about. Something that the nanny wouldn’t have written down in the log book or we didn’t really talk about over dinner. Even now that I spend all day with her, when I do her bedtime, we still do our 3 questions.
Bedtime Routine Questions
They aren’t complicated questions. They were concepts that she could understand even as young as 2 years old. The great thing about it is that they are questions that even make me examine my day. It’s a great practice in vulnerability, for both of us.
- Tell me a time today when you were brave.
- Tell me a time today when you were kind.
- Tell me something that you are grateful for today.
I don’t expect her to go out of her way to make sure she checks off all of these items. And sometimes, I don’t have an answer for when I was brave or kind (don’t judge) but that pushes me to make sure that I am kind the next day. That I am brave in some way so that I can model that behavior for her.
As she’s gotten older, I really look forward to this part of our bedtime routine. I can see how insightful her answers have become and I hope that this practice will help instill bravery, kindness and gratefulness in her already huge heart.